So!!! Things are becoming better.

A couple of weeks ago, I went to a Sub class that dealt with Negotiating. I learned a lot of stuff in that class. Not only is communication THE key to this, so is honesty. If one of the sides are not sure, they need to say so about what it is you're negotiating. For example: Master Paul and his Sub acted out a scene, where they met up, and had coffee. They negotiated going over to Master Paul's house, for a small scene. The sub brought a friend, and was tied up, before the sub was handcuffed to the wall. The scene basically pointed out that there was a miss communication. Negotiations are a way of getting to know someone's limits, either hard or soft. To find the triggers of potentially bad situations. There was a lot of things learned in this class. One thing I learned, is that Most Doms can do a scene at your comfort level. Just because you see one playing rough with a sub, does NOT mean that is the only way s/he does scenes. They are able to become gentle, or more rough, if that is what you wish. I knew this in the back of my head, but I didn't really KNOW it. I always they were always were just that one way. The important part is making sure you are communicating your vision to the other party, while making sure you keep in mind that they are doing the same thing. I've yet to play with a Dom quite yet. My own, more of an on going small power exchange type of thing. Nothing extreme, yet. I've asked that more protocol be involved. Things like, walking behind him, or sitting next to him during dinner (though that will be very hard when at work). But I myself need to learn what kinds of protocol exists, and to experiment with them. I hope that he will be doing these things, the whole protocol thing. I have the knowledge to be a sub, but I would love to have the experience as well. It feels like that would fill a missing piece in my soul, or something of that sort.

On another note, who knows about a man called Moordach Nythroe? No one? he was around six feet tall, light brown hair, bordering on dark blonde. He was a protector. One who came to this earth around 15,000 years ago. Sent here, for some reason. The town he protected, the people thought he was some sort of god. He was able to make fire come from his hands, fly without birds wings. Heal wounds that would otherwise cripple a person. He didn't have any magical powers. This was all done on faith. "Faith in God you mean?" Maybe. Mind over matter. Faith that his will was strong enough to heal, protect. Sometimes, the towns folk asked if he had wings, because they swore they saw wings on his back when he walked away. Was it their imagination? Or were they really there? Moordach Nythroe, is from Sirius. I don't know what planet, but i feel a pull back to that place. A place of wonderous technology. A place where there is peace, finally. Moordach has been tormented since he arrived, because of the constant war this planet is having. War against each other, for the smallest of things. Boundries. Oil. Moordach, is me. It is my first life on this planet that I remember. My very first incarnation. I know there are previous ones, as I have 'dreamed' them. I sat in my chair back in Nevada, and suddenly said, out of no where, "There IS life around Sirius...how do I know this for certain?" I feel it with every fibre of my being. Like I'm being called. And, I've been there. They saw my spirit form. I almost went back one time, but I was stopped. Yea, i know this sounds crazy as hell. But I dreamed I was looking over a stargate, like from SG-1. except horizontal. I was escorted through this ice chamber. I looked down, and I was told "You will not be able to return here, if you go through. You will be going to your real home though..." I had put my foot over the edge, and was about to step off, when I woke up. Now, if that was a dream, why do I remember it so vividly? After 7 years? The color of the room was ice. SG-1 team members, from the show, were there. Carter, she was with me at the top, telling me I wouldn't be able to return. The Colonel, he escorted me to Carter. T'ealc, he was standing guard. I can't remember the civilians name, but he was up higher, nodding to me. I looked into all of their eyes, and I KNEW it was my people. Dream? I doubt it. Gives you something to think about at least.